Hello, Kansas City! Dating can be a confusing and intimidating subject to cover with your kids, as they get older. Luckily, our Mom Squad Ambassador, Leah, has a great idea on how to teach your adolescent or teenage boy about dating. Take a look…
A Creative Way to Teach Your Son about Dating
Nine years ago I was blessed enough to make an amazing friend named Lora. At the time, Lora and both had sons playing on the same T Ball team. I knew upon first meeting her that her friendship would impact my life. I was so right. Lora is an amazing mother who truly inspires me on a daily basis. I come to her often seeking advice on raising my teenage son. We meet up usually once a month, have dinner, let the boys hang out, and catch up on life.
During those times we often exchange stories about parenting, talk about ways to better our lives, exchange cooking tips, encourage each other, laugh a lot, and simply just get each other through whatever we are going through at that time.
Since our boys were born literally a day a part they are often going through similar situations … which typically gives us a lot to talk about. Lora and I often talk about how to give them tips and support on being a teenager, how to treat others, how to teach them responsibility, friendship, education, etc.
During one of our discussions we got on the topic of when they will start dating. We both discussed how important it is that our boys learn how to “date” first. We wanted to make sure they knew how to treat a date properly, how valuable a woman’s reputation is, how to respect her, how to hold the door for her, how to hold a conversation, etc.
Lora came up with a beautiful idea to take our boys on a series of dates. We both wanted a way to show them how to date properly. We knew this would take more than one date and more than one talk. We also knew that this would truly teach them life skills most men are never taught. We wanted the boys to see that dating is something that shouldn’t be taken lightly. The boys both surprisingly were excited about the idea.
On our first “date” we took the boys to the movies. We instructed them on proper behavior while being on a date at the movies. While we drove there we also gave suggestions on how girls like to be treated, talked to (in person and on the phone), and tips on how to ask a girl on date, to let the girl pick the movie, etc.
We also on our own went over tips on knowing if a girl is worth pursuing, how to treat a girl once you decided you liked her, and things to never say to or about a lady.
On our second “date” we took the boys to a fancy dinner. We let the boys pick where we ate. I had my son call and make us dinner reservations. He decided he wanted to put on his “best outfit” for our date. It made me smile to see how excited he was it.
While on the “date” we encouraged the boys to open the restaurant door, pull out the chairs for us, proper dining etiquette, to let us order first, to wait to eat until we started eating, gave them topics to talk about, things to never say on a date, how to break the silence if that were to happen, how to greet her parents, how to treat her friends, how to act as a couple in public, etc.
I feel that both boys learned a lot from our dates. Honestly, I think we all did.
We both plan on continuing to teach our boys how to be gentlemen. We are planning on having a series of ten date’s total. On each “date” different topics will be covered on how to “date”. We will be going over how to act on group dates, what to do if a date suggests things you aren’t ready for, how to break off a bad relationship, how to know if they are not right for you, things you should not accept from a date, how to resist peer pressure in dating, how to know you are ready to date, etc. I am personally looking forward to many more dates with them.
I think one of the most important jobs as a mother is raising a man that you can be proud of. I think it is safe to say we both have done that or are trying our best to do so. I am so blessed to not be alone on this journey of raising a man who knows how to treat a lady. Thank you Lora for the beautiful idea and for our beautiful friendship.
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From iFamily to Yours,