Hello, Kansas City! We’re bringing you a personal (and fun) post for you from our Mom Squad Ambassador, Connie, today. Parenthood and life is just hard sometimes, and many of us feel like we’re being pulled in a million different directions. Connie reminds us all that it’s okay to be a hot mess — we’re all in this together. Take a look…
How to Embrace Yourself Even When You’re a Hot Mess!
In a society full of people who make parenting and life and working all look so easy, I am that girl. The girl who is always late. The girl who’s clothes are comfortable first, and cute..maybe. The girl who drinks sometimes and sings terrible karaoke. The girl who needs to carry post it notes to write down what she is leaving the room for so she won’t forget by the time she gets to her destination. The girl who says exactly what she is thinking, when she is thinking it, instead of thinking about whether or not it should be said. The girl loves passionately and gets excited about everything. I am that girl. And I am proud of it.
Embracing your inner hot mess can sometimes be a struggle. We all have that one friend who makes it all look so easy. Her hair is done, her clothes match, her kids look adorable and her house is clean. Ha. I am so not that girl. You can choose one or the other. Either I look put together or the house does. I have two signature looks: homeless and Sporty Spice (minus all the scary makeup and platforms). My fancy outfits usually involve leggings and Chucks. I sometimes feel like I have so much going on in my head that I will never get it all done, so I sit on the couch for an hour just pondering the complete craziness of it all and realize that I’ve just made myself late for whatever the days obligation happens to be.
I love my children fiercely and unconditionally and I try so hard to always be patient and present and the best possible mother I can be. But I also sometimes feed them microwave pancakes for dinner and yell at them for something minor because I’m stressing about something else that has nothing to do with them. I like to think that by being the imperfect mess that I am, I am teaching them to just be who they are.
Apologize for their mistakes and move on with it. Life is too short and parenting is way too hard to stress over every misstep and bad day.
I am emotional and excited about everything. Yay tshirts have armholes! Hooray, my favorite song is on the radio! QT white peach tea makes my day. I am basically a 3 year old. I am the girl who dances at the bowling alley after she throws the ball, or at the gym between sets, or in the grocery store aisle. And let’s not get started on the dance parties in the car. My car stereo is often on max volume, especially if the sunroof is open, and my kids and I are car dancing all our cares away. Now, my dance moves are not especially dignified, and I am okay with that. I’m having fun and that is all that matters. Being emotional and easily excitable means that I am often undignified and wound up. But it also means that I am genuinely enthusiastic about life and the people who are in mine.
I can’t keep track of where I am supposed to be and when. Ever. I am constantly late, not because I am inconsiderate or think that I am above being on time, its because I genuinely cannot get it together sometimes. I couldn’t figure out which shirt to wear with what leggings, and then I didn’t realize that my daughter hadn’t brushed her hair yet, and she isn’t currently wearing shoes, nor can she find shoes because her room is a disaster. And my son is dressed, but his shirt is too small and has some of his breakfast stuck to it and he’s got blueberry pancakes on his face. Then I step outside and realize I have no shoes on. Once I get the shoes, I realize I left the gift for the party or the water bottle for practice or the check for dance, and I have to run back inside and get it.
I am that girl, and I am okay with it. I have to be, because try as I may, I can’t change who I am. I will always be the girl who trusts first and gets burned later, and who shows up late to your party, but with a very thoughtful gift, and who’s kids are sweet and thoughtful and sometimes dirty or rocking some bed head. I am that girl who is doing the best I can and loving every minute of this crazy life I lead. My kids are happy and loved and just like me as far as the hot mess factor goes. I am not the girl people come to for fashion advice or tips on how to have it all together. I am not the girl who feeds her kids well balanced meals all the time. I am not the girl who never yells or cusses or drinks. I am not the girl who has mastered the art of motherhood, or adulthood even for that matter. I am however, the girl who knows how to embrace this crazy life and just enjoy it. I am the girl who can laugh at myself, apologize when I need to and defend my friends whenever they need it. Life is hard.
Parenting?!?!? Crazy hard. Having it all together, all the time? Impossible. So just embrace the mess. Own it. Know that not everyday is going to be perfect, but sometimes it’s the imperfect days that we cherish the most. And know that I see you, rocking your oversized sweats and t-shirt with baby food all down the front at Walmart, just trying to get through the day. You are my people.
From iFamily to Yours,